All week I’ve been pumping myself up for today’s run. I’ve been running 5 miles on Tuesdays now, I’ve been here before, last week I did 10. Then this morning came. I so did not want to wake up. Waited until last minute. I had this moment of I don’t want to run today. I’m tired. This is where I am so glad I do this with a group, no way I would have done it on my own today. Started running behind. It was foggy out. Started thinking about all the animal possibilities. Forgot about 1 possibility and thank God, I did not think about that one (black bears have been spotted all around cities lately). Get there just as we are going out. started off what felt slow but was a good pace for me. I found that out when I hear my watch going off. It felt like such a hard two miles of getting going though. The fog scared me a bit and then for some reason the geese were noisy.
But it was beautiful. God was sure in full artistry this morning. He had some rays coming through the trees and fog like I’ve never seen but it was truly amazing. Then I started to talk with him. I started thinking about all my troubles and how I keep getting sucked into this negativity that I ever so hate being in. How I just feel so distant lately no matter how hard I try to make my time for Him, how I’ve been faltering. I talked about the children in Africa and asked Him to help me to remember why I am doing this, as well as prayed for the people supporting me and several others in my life. My next 3 miles were amazing. I ran them so well and felt pretty great. Mile 6 was harder. The tiredness took over. I tried to stretch it out and then tried to do my energy treats and water. Sure I felt like I could run again but nothing like I was. The heaviness in the air took over. I was drenched and so very tired. I ran/ walked the last two miles but they felt so hard to do. I finished and I was not in the right headspace again. I stopped for a min to check in but I just couldn’t socialize like normal. The thing is, it does not bother me at all coming in last, it bothered me that I felt like I just get this run together. It felt like 10 miles was easier than 8. I know the humidity this morning really played into it all. But I just had a hard time getting over it this morning.
I love my running. I love inspiring others and I remind myself of this. I remind myself of how far I have come. I mean who thought this fat little girl would ever run 8, let alone 10 or 26.2 miles. Not me! But here I am doing it. I remind myself that I finished. I did it. It wasn’t beating my time from 2 weeks ago but I got out there and did it. 1/2 way through my run, I was told, “I am so thankful for you. You make me feel so good because you help me to remember it’s not about being the fastest”. I love that! This is someone who was afraid to run but I have inspired her with others to just go out there and do what you can do. I need to remember to thank her because really today she is what I needed. This is not easy but I love doing it. And I totally kicked butt the rest of today and will continue to have awesome days that may not feel it at 1st but will totally rock.
I do have to give credit to my teammates for the outdoor pics as I kept wishing I’d take my phone out for pics but was afraid to slow down too much. I love that World Vision has brought us together and love what they are doing for the children in need of clean water and so much more. Find my link and help support me in this journey.Sending All My Love!
Now tell me your story-